My Thank You to Ignatieff's Ancestors

While Bob Rae remains my man to lead the Canadian revolution, I need to give some props to the aristocracy that brought us the Red October Revolution of 1917, the ancestors that Michael Ignatieff brags about. The drunken farmers in Animal Farm, the Ignatieff Aristocracy, paved the way for my beloved Iron Curtain. Their incompetence allowed my heroes to bring state Communism to the world on a massive scale, leading to a Golden Age of Marxism that historians such as myself can only dream about and often do. I want Bob Rae to assume control of the Liberal Party and unite the left at the nearest opportunity, but I do feel an enormous amount of nostalgia for the Ignatieff family.

The World can officially thank the Ignatieff family for Joe Stalin, the often misunderstood hero of Marxism, who did what needed to be done to bring Heaven to Earth. I know that bleeding hearts like Orwell and Trotsky would bemoan the necessity of Stalin, but you need men with "iron balls" like Stalin to impose the dream. It can't happen any other way. Trotsky deserved to die, and I hope that he burns in a Hell that I don't believe exists.

I just wanted to take this opportunity to say thank you to Michael Ignatieff. Your forefathers made Heaven on Earth possible for billions of people. You are blessed in your place among the immortal heroes of revolution.